meera, get out of the car.
beta, please. Do as your aunt says.
you know, she's always been like this!
Extra independent, overly headstrong, all the time!
Well, then, you should be used to it.
move over.
Mee...
Meera, meera, this is a good boy.
He's studying to be a doctor.
Great! Maybe he can cure you of your backward thinking!
Beta, why can't you just meet with him? That's all.
Meera, we only want what's best for you!
No, you want what's best for you!
suresh, do something.
- I am switzerland, ma'am! - I want a career.
I have dreams, so I should get to choose.
So, choose. We've given you so many options.
I choose me! I choose me.
No, no! No, no, no, no. You can't marry yourself.
Why not? At least, I will be with someone that I love.
You know, this love-jove thing of yours...
So much for being switzerland.
What is the point of knowing everything
About the person you love before the marriage?
It's boring. Ask your uncle.
Do something.
- Beta... - Come on.
- Beta listen, please. - Meera!
God! Look at what she's done.
I want freedom.
Meera, marriage is freedom.
You will get your inheritance and the freedom
To do whatever you want to do after you are married.
Please, meera. I had promised your mother
That I will see to it that you are settled.
You know, she loved you.
She was worried about your future.
Just meet him.
If not for me, at least for her?
Okay.
Come on.
I don't care.
Just tell them, "yes."
What does it matter if I meet them now or after the wedding?
this belonged to your mother.
It's been passed down for generations.
I'm sure, she would've wanted you to wear it.
Kavita, it will take us time to reach the venue.
- We also have to load the car. - Yes, we'll be right back.
What should I do, suresh kaka?
The heart finds its own way.
We only need to listen.
dear groom, I know that I have picked the worst time,
But it would be unfair to you and to myself
If I let us go through with this.
Dear aunty and uncle, I hope you can forgive me.
meera, why is the door locked?
Open right now.
Uh...
Namaste, uncle.
Meera?
I'm sorry.
Auto!
- Meera? - How was the beta test?
Amazing, as always.
We even made a c-list celebrity cry. It's a good thing, silly.
We wiped all her ex's sabotage right off the web.
Everyone deserves a second chance.
Meera. You got this.
There's a reason you're on new york's 30 under 30 list.
Founder ceo who code their own products don't just happen.
Silas averly won't know what hit him.
- The tech is good, right? - Mm-hm.
I mean, he's helped take multiple companies go public.
Are we at that level?
He'd be crazy not to invest.
Oh, we need his investment to get out of beta.
Hey, you think we went too far with the sites?
No. It's personalized. These people love personalized.
Even dawn likes it.
If our cfo likes it, you know you're gonna be okay.
All right.
Greetings, my totally platonic coworker.
Lovely weather we're having, right?
I told him I don't want a serious relationship
So he's been greeting me with small talk all day.
Hm, sure. You two are so weird.
And you, girl, are about to make history.
Okay?
- Oh. - Hey, honey.
- Hi. - Hi.
What-what are you doing here?
I just want to wish you good luck.
Your big day.
Uh, uh, yes.
Thank you for the abs of support.
Oh. Meera. Look alive. Here comes dawn with silas.
Please disappear immediately. Go, go, go.
Silas, this is meera kumar, our ceo.
And leslie, cofounder and marketing wiz.
- Ladies, this is... - Uh, silas averly.
So good to meet you.
It really is, uh...
I'm sorry, my hands are covered in a dense polymer lotion
That might ignite when it comes to contact with greasy skin.
- And, well... - Yes, of course.
Um, could I get you something to eat or drink?
We're gonna order lunch.
I'm fasting.
The body goes into ketosis up to 36 hours.
Dear god, can we just do this, please?
- Yes. - Yeah, okay.
For centuries, people used to just live their lives,
Make mistakes and learn from them.
But these days, even the smallest miscalculations
Can haunt you forever.
The naked pictures your jerk ex put on pornhub.
Or that mugshot from those drunken college escapade
In myrtle beach.
Honestly, any type of humiliating thing
That shouldn't cost you your career
And important relationships in your life.
There are services, expensive ones
That only the wealthy can afford that can scrub information
From the net.
But we wanna bring that technology
To the average person.
We wanna help them... Start again.
Start again's algorithm will quickly scour the internet,
And help suppress harmful search results.
Essentially, you get a clean slate.
To demonstrate, we've spun up a few articles
About someone you may recognize.
Is that me?
I'm sorry, did you fabricate pictures of me?
Yes, um, in this scenario, you are an alcoholic
And a serial streaker.
And by the way, I made these masterpieces all by myself.
these are some examples
Of the kinds of lies that can get out there.
"start again" will find sites like this
And make them disappear.
Using online shredding technology
That is on par with the cia.
just a second.
What did you do? Did you publish these?
Why am I getting 50 google alerts with my name on it?
No. This is... We checked the code yesterday.
Everything was working. What's happening?
Where's the freakin' remote?
It'll just take a few hours to fix. It's a small error.
No. You'll pay for one of these sites to erase all that.
The expensive ones.
The ones that work.
Or you're gonna have a libel case on your hands.
Uh, silas...
Open the door.
Silas, please. Just hear me out.
It's a small error, it's just a small...
Can you stop, please?
I'm, I'm trying to do some work here.
so am I.
I got to keep trim, the cirque isn't woke yet
To body shaming. Just a few more and I'll be good to go again.
I'm glad you can fit me in.
Of course, relationship 101,
A.B.S. Always be supportive.
What's wrong? Maybe I can help.
Do you know 256-bit encryption?
No.
Then you can't help.
Okay, I may not know coding, but I can do this.
I appreciate your body. I really do.
It's just, I need to figure out what happened here.
Do you want to sex about it instead?
So, that table is a rental actually.
Though it'll probably be repossessed.
There's nothing wrong with the demo code.
I've gone over it half a dozen times
In the last few days.
I just spoke to our backers.
They put the next drawdown on hold
Till we figure out what went wrong.
Not to harsh the vibe, but we could have been hacked.
Hacked?
Also, most of the engineers have given in their two week notice.
If we were hacked, then the underlying tech is good.
So, we just need to beef up the security and prove it to them.
So... Is that like a five minute thing?
A five day thing?
Is there anything we can be doing to help
Besides sitting on our asses waiting?
We can't do anything until we can update our servers.
That costs. And we need a team for that.
You mean the one that's quitting?
There-there's gotta be a way.
You know, I can see you guys. What's going on here?
- I'm not calling them. - "them?" who is them?
It's a long story.
Meera has an inheritance in india.
Okay, I guess it's not that long of a story.
- Great! Go, call them. - It's not that simple.
She can't get it unless she's married to an indian guy.
Yeah, she was gonna get married years ago,
But then she ran away from it.
On her wedding day.
You could have left that bit out.
You know, I knew a runaway bride...
I am not a runaway bride.
We're running out of time.
I've got to go talk to the accountants.
Meera, it's worth a shot.
Okay? There's nothing to lose, except for what, pride?
Right?
Fine.
I just, uh...
I don't know what I'm gonna tell them.
Kavita, come along. Meera is calling.
What? What's she calling for? She barely talks to us.
I don't know, but I'm answering it.
Come.
Hi, uncle... Aunty.
How are you both?
Still alive.
Stop it.
Hello, beta. So good to see you.
You too.
Um, now listen, the reason that I'm calling
Is because I have...
Uh...
I have missed you.
And hopefully, that we can have a fresh start.
I have been thinking about...
Uh, how much I...
Want us to be closer.
- That's it. - Why is that?
I need a little tiny bit of cash.
A little cash.
Ah, so...
You're calling us because you want us to bail you out,
After barely talking to us for years.
After leaving your groom stranded at the altar.
- After... - I-I was wrong.
And you...
You w-were right.
I'm sorry, I didn't hear that, can you run that by me again?
You were right, and it would be great if I could
Get my inheritance, if you can't loan me anything.
well, I didn't write the will.
You know, my sister only entrusted us with it.
You can override it, right?
No, you know, there are many things that I didn't agree
With my sister on, but she was extremely explicit
About this part.
Also, beta, your mom didn't want you to be alone.
You must be married to satisfy the terms of the trust.
Maybe you can do something?
Uh, I can't.
- Uh, okay. - Hey, aunty ji.
Uncle.
Okay, if I may just advocate for meera here...
You need to advocate for yourself first.
For the last four months, I've been sending you
Good morning messages every single morning
And not a peep out of you.
I expect a little bit better from my nephew.
Meera can advocate for herself.
Well, the reason that I'm actually calling is-is
Because I...
I'm married.
Yeah, yeah, I'm married, um, to-to an indian guy.
And you are going to love him.
Whoa, that's splendid news, meera!
Why weren't we invited for the wedding?
I wanted it to be a surprise.
Surprise!
When did this happen?
Oh, few months ago. Hm-hm.
Lovely, we're so thrilled for you.
What lovely? We haven't met them yet.
What's this boy's name?
Oh, aunty, don't get bogged down in the details.
I, I will tell you later. Question.
Um, you just want me to send you a picture
Or, uh, can you take my word for it?
No, beta. It's not so simple.
We are talking about a lot of money here.
So, you need to come home with the husband
Show us the marriage certificates
Sign paper works with the lawyers,
And then and only then will you have your money.
don't worry, we'll arrange everything.
You just get here within a week
Because we're going on a holiday soon.
Hm, call me tomorrow. We'll discuss this.
Bye, beta. Love you.
How the hell am I gonna find a fake husband in a week?
- Hello, how are you, yar? - All good?
Yeah, that's great...
Aunty, I love your daughter.
This is probably how your aunt and uncle felt
Looking at proposals.
Rakesh pillai.
Oh, rakesh pillai.
Okay, do not worry, your fake future husband is out there.
- Maybe. - Hi.
Little more, okay? Okay.
Just give me a moment to-to internalize.
You messed with the wrong woman, aunty.
Hm, next.
♪ on the beat huh from the mean streets of mumbai ♪
♪ I run killing makes money but it's not fun ♪
♪ I had me some homies but they got shot with a gun ♪
Yeah, bro. Are you okay?
- Peace. - Namaskar, baby.
Mera naam todd... Hai
You're a white guy.
I just have one small requirement.
Yeah.
Actually, I'm married and I have six children.
No. Sorry.
that's it.
We can try again. Do another casting.
I think the polyamorous father of six is your best bet,
Given you're near spinsterhood.
So, shall I block his dates?
The more I think about the backend of the code,
Something is wrong.
Meera, focus. Fake husband.
Oh, honey. Don't touch your face.
That's only gonna make you break out,
You don't want that for tonight.
What's tonight?
The 30 under 30 cocktail reception.
Wait what? No, no.
I can't go to that. They're gonna know I'm a fraud.
The whole industry is full of frauds, okay?
So, how about you go full elizabeth holmes on them
And get that money?
Hm-hm?
I feel like everyone can see you right through me.
You better shove that imposter syndrome right up your...
I mean, you're a genius coder
And you care about the people you help.
You've created a deeply impactful company.
The one that's about to be sued
By most important investor in the city.
Details.
I see some vc hunks by the shrimp. Let's go get that bread!
Can I get a manhattan, please?
And could you move those? Peanut allergy.
Is there a cherry shortage?
You already have three on there.
Hm, I don't.
Wow! Rookie.
You can't even hold your cherries.
Ha-ha, so funny, except I could've died.
We know honestly that probably would've been salvation
From all these investor types.
Shuck, silas.
- You okay? - Hm. So, so good.
Hm, do you mind staying right there and blocking me
From that angle?
I'm rama, by the way.
Meera.
So, meera. What are we hiding from?
The bringer of darkness. Eater of worlds.
They call him the soul crusher.
He's on your 6 o'clock.
Wow. Intense.
So, what brings you here?
Wow! Pulling out all the classics.
Um, I'm on the list.
Oh, what a coincidence, so am I.
What are the odds? What do you do?
I run a company called dinna time.
The celebrity chef thing? I've used it.
Oh, you're the one!
How did you get all the chefs on board?
Let me guess. Threaten them with hours of banter?
You know what, close, but no.
My parents wanted me to do the stereotypical indian thing,
You know, become a lawyer or a doctor
Or take over the family business, but, um,
I wanted to do something else.
I know the feeling.
I love to cook and I was a chef for a while.
Meet a lot of great friends, celebrity ones.
And I guess, I realized that I'd never be as good as them
So I did the next best thing.
Dinna time.
Might have easier just to do the "indian thing?"
You know what, honestly, it probably would've,
But, um, I guess life has a funny way
Of making other plans.
What about you? What's your 30 under 30 claim to fame?
Oh, mine is an app... That erases your past.
Wow! You know, I could honestly use that.
I had this awful hairstyle back in college.
Shaggy hair with blonde highlights.
There's this photos on facebook, it's pretty bad.
- He's gone, by the way. - Who is?
Silas averly. I'm assuming he was your "eater of worlds?"
- You know him. - Yeah, he's one of my investors.
Of course, he is.
Uh, excuse me a moment.
Thank you.
Who is that?
Ah, the creator of dinna time.
Oh, he's cute.
what about him?
- "what about him" what? - Fake husband.
Uh, no, no, no. He has a job.
- Did you ask him? - Of course not.
- I'll ask. - No! Don't do that.
Hm-hm. okay.
Hello, meera.
Silas.
What a wonderful surprise. Um, what're you doing here?
Well, obviously, I'm 30 under 30 alumni.
But now I'm a mentor.
Of course you are.
- I'm glad you're here. - Really?
It saves me the trouble of having to serve you at home.
"serve you at home."
the papers.
This is your cue to give her the papers.
Consider yourself... Served.
Have a wonderful night.
meera.
I hear you're looking for a fake husband?
He said yes.
Uh, are you serious?
We can't pay you much or...
Oh, no! You don't have to pay me anything.
I go to india every couple of years.
Maybe this will just spice it up a little bit.
You have no idea how much you'll be helping me out.
And if you meet my family,
You have enough spice for a couple of trips.
Sounds like a deal.
Honestly, this is how I imagined my wedding will always be.
- Fake wedding, marriage. - Of course, yes.
Sure on the up and up.
Except for the lying and fakery.
- Of course. - Oh, my god! I have a lot to do.
I have to tell my boyfriend that I have a fake husband!
Okay, I'll see you all later. Leslie. Please.
Thanks.
Oh, boy!
P ever.
This isn't a breakup. It's...
You said that you would support me, right?
Like, a.B.S. Or whatever.
So I am supposed to hang out with you and your fake husband?
Is this like a threesome thing?
What? No!
I'm confused.
I'll be back in like a week.
Oh, yo! Damn, the cirque group chat is going off!
Jebediah the tightrope guy needs a sub for tonight.
"don't injure your junk unless it's in the bunk."
That's what I always say. Right, meera?
Uh, dawn? Hey, what's up?
silas offered to drop the chargers
If we sell our tech to him.
No, no, no, no.
- We can't do that. - we can't?
That is definitely off the table.
we're running out of options, meera.
Okay, bye.
Okay. What was meera state champion of in high school?
Debate. She's so annoying to argue with.
- Debate it is, for sure. - Correct.
yeah, no brainer.
oh, meera, are you there?
Can you hear me?
Dawn wants to give the company to silas.
What?
It's the only way he will drop the lawsuit.
Well, that brought the mood down.
You have the fake marriage certificate, right?
Uh, no, I think that's in your bag.
Oh, right, right.
thanks again for doing this.
Hey, is gray really your favorite color?
Or are you just being a contrarian?
Ha. Ha. Just remember the plan.
Oh, and share enough, so, they know that you know me.
Are you, are you okay with the boundaries?
You know, because of aunty...
Oh, yeah. We're just friends.
It's okay. I don't want anything serious anyway.
Great! Me neither.
- Here goes nothing. - bhaiya, how much?
300.
- Three... - Wait.
There is something I wanna give you.
What's this?
It's a ring, you know, to add authenticity
To your elaborate and well-thought out plan.
Whoa!
But, I-I didn't get you...
That's okay, when I realized, I just grabbed at a duty-free.
I'm simple.
He's simple.
There is nothing simple about that ring.
- Suresh kaka. - Meera beta.
- I missed you. - I missed you too.
This is suresh kaka.
He's worked with my aunt and uncle since I can remember.
Suresh kaka.
he's basically family.
- I'll take your bag. - Okay.
Now listen, I know, I told you that my aunt can be very cold,
So don't expect, like, a warm welcome.
Honestly, I'd be surprised if she even acknowledged you.
- Just... - here you are.
Aunty...
Welcome, welcome.
- Hi. - Hello.
- This is rama. - Namaste.
I'm rama.
Welcome to the family.
Oh, what a lovely boy.
He knows how to respect his elders.
Puru, you are looking rather american.
Oh, you liking what you see, aunty ji, huh?
Welcome.
Uncle.
You must be meera's friend, the lovely leslie.
Oh, yes, that is me, I'm the lovely leslie.
- Welcome. - Our home is your home.
Please come on in, everyone.
Okay, perfect.
They are fantastic.
Wow! You didn't tell me you left a
That was... Really dumb.
Really. Oh, wow!
Now, I want to know everything about rama.
And why you didn't invite us to the wedding.
Or didn't even tell us.
Please, forgive us, aunty.
Right, please forgive us.
It's actually entirely my fault.
Meera is completely innocent here.
We got married in a hurry
Because of what pandit ji told us.
Oh?
What did he say?
Well, he told us it's very auspicious time
To get married, maha sukhmuhurat.
Saturn, jupiter, mars, venus, sun and moon
And stars were all aligned.
Uh, of course, I refused.
And I said that I will not get married without the blessings
Of meera's family.
But he insisted and said that maha shubhmuhurat
Is for that day only, and if we don't get married on that day,
Our marriage would only last only one life time
Instead of seven.
Well, I thought that was a pretty good deal, so...
- I agreed. - Wow!
I had no idea. That's beautiful.
Anyway, I assured meera that once you knew the truth,
You would understand and you would forgive us.
Do you think I made the right choice, aunty?
Of course.
Mahashubhmuhurat doesn't happen every day, does it, hm?
Truly is a miracle.
Oh, ya. There's no other word for it.
This is my marriage certificate.
Um, no need to check it on with lawyers or anything.
It's all in the up and ups.
Always in a hurry for the most important things in life.
We have plenty of time for that after the party.
- Hm? - Pa-party?
What party?
You know, she's always had this independent streak
About her. Come on, meera.
You don't think after getting married
And coming all the way from america to india
We wouldn't want to celebrate with our relatives?
yeah.
Of course.
Silly of us.
Anyway, you must be so tired,
After the long trip, so freshen up.
Take a nap and we will meet right back here for dinner.
Yeah, yes.
- Okay. - Yeah.
Well, I hope you like what I've done to your room.
Mm. You lovebirds.
Go on.
Puru, you can take her to the second guest room, yes?
Okay.
Hey, your family's really nice.
nice? You thought that was nice?
Oh, yeah. No, you're right.
They are very awful. They are really, really terrible people.
Congrats, you're now caught in her web.
You watch, now she's going to try to control
Every aspect of your life.
Huh! Is this about the party?
Yes, two minutes here and
She's already planning our itinerary.
And then she has the gall to call me "too independent."
Classic. Who lights candles during the day?
Uh, millions of people, actually.
You know, for prayers, for wishes, for love.
Look, I'll admit what you did out there, impressive.
But this is a business deal. And you're like my employee.
okay, boss.
The reason that we're here is so that I can sign some papers.
So that dawn doesn't have to settle with silas
And then I can save my company.
Okay, so, could you just not fall into her web?
Okay, sure. Next time, I see her,
I'll watch out for those fangs when she offers me ladoo.
See this? This is my nightmare.
This is your night... Roses are your nightmare?
Yes. It's all so... Presumptuous!
What, that we're newlyweds in love?
Instead of employee, employer?
I mean, I wonder who could've given her that idea?
Hm. You know what, whatever.
Uh, I'm gonna get changed,
'cause I've been in these clothes forever
And I gotta get in touch with the office.
So...
I'm sorry.
My aunt just knows how to get under my skin.
- I appreciate you. - Appreciate you, too.
Also, I'm taking the bed.
and I just spilled the whole thing.
And that's how I made gordon ramsey cry in his own kitchen.
You know, I-I realized like most people who hide behind bravado,
There is a scared little child who fears rejection.
Ah. Another great story. And how true.
You have such amazing stories.
Unlike meera, who is always sulking at the table
Like she is doing now.
Okay, I-I'm not sulking.
Uh, it is, it's just...
so spicy.
I love it.
Yeah, it's not spicy at all.
Yeah. I find that indian food has an evolving heat.
Whereas american heat just kind of bashes you
In the face with cayenne.
Lacks the sultry sophistication of kashmiri red chili.
Exactly!
Meera, it must be so nice to have a man who has taste.
How did the two of you meet? Do tell.
- At a party. - Online.
Um, actually, I saw her photo online.
You know, she is in new york's 30 under 30?
Really?
- Our meera? - oh, yes.
She's very modest about her accomplishments.
- Much like you, aunty. - Oh! Yes.
I've been known to be very humble.
Um, anyway, I was at a party one evening and she was there.
And I swear, it was as if the air in the room shifted
The moment that she walked in.
You know how in our bollywood movies there's that moment
Where a love song plays
And all our hero sees is his heroine?
And the tide of his life suddenly veers.
Well, it was exactly like that.
I approached her and when I looked into her eyes,
They were like warm pools of sunshine
That I could lose myself in.
And when she touched my hand, it...
I felt as if a thousand arrows from kamadeva's bow
Had just come straight into my heart.
Hm.
Oh, kamadeva is the og cupid.
But instead of being a chubby baby,
He's a handsome young man.
And his arrows are made of flowers.
I love flowers.
Well, needless to say, I was smitten.
And when I saw the roses that you left on our bed,
I was reminded of that ancient tale
And how I fell in love with your niece, so...
Thank you, aunty. That was very thoughtful of you.
And meera loved them, too, didn't you?
Yeah, roses. Nice touch.
I think I like more than a thorny rose bush.
I knew you'd like the petals.
Didn't I say so, om, hm?
Hm? Oh, yes, yes.
Darling. Can I see you for a private moment?
- We're just having a nice... - Yeah, I need you now.
- Ooh! - Not like that.
- Yeah. - Charm.
- Lovebirds. - Oh, aunty, please.
Don't be silly.
- Hm! - they are cute.
Cute, cute.
Cheers, guys. The food is amazing.
Oh, thank you.
- What was that? - What was what?
- If you have ulterior motives... - Ulterior motives?
My aunt and uncle will not be investing in dinna time.
I have investors. What are you...
What are you after with this charm offensive
You got going on, telling wild tales of hindu gods...
Okay, those are not wild tales.
That's our culture that everyone's borrowed from.
You know, there would be no cupid if it wasn't for us.
Look, maybe I'm this way because I don't know, that's who I am
And I wanna help you.
Look, meera. My father owns hotels.
Okay, it's the family business.
But I was cut off when I decided to go my own way too.
Alright, it was a struggle.
So, I get that about you more than you might know.
I also get that you wanna show the world who you are,
So you try to work harder than anyone, and sometimes so hard
That you lose yourself to who you wanna be,
And in the end you're neither of those people.
And sometimes, that's the loneliest place on earth.
I'm not lonely. I have a boyfriend... I think.
And you don't know me.
You're rigid and you're weird.
And by weird, I mean the best possible kind. Okay?
But you are cold and distant to even your closest friends.
You've probably been through a lot of meaningless relationships
Because you've had your heart broken by friends, by family,
By men that you put your trust in.
So, I think you don't seem to trust anyone or anything
Except for that gnawing gut feeling inside you
That tells you, "I can be great.
I can do great things."
And you can and you will.
- You think I'm weird? - And you think I'm charming.
I guess we both hear what we want to, don't we?
I hope I'm not disturbing anything!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, nothing.
Okay. Great, so... Your aunty wants you back.
She wants to talk party details.
We'll be out in a minute.
Take your time.
- This is just business. - Mm. See? Cold and distant.
You forgot weird.
- Coming? - Oh, now you want my charm.
Okay.
What's really going on, puru?
Huh, kavita aunty?
Nothing, I'm just thirsty.
You've been avoiding me.
Me? No, I'm not.
- Yes. - Okay, I've been avoiding you.
Yes, well, you've been so busy with party plans
And everything, and I was like, okay, you...
Stop this, puru.
You know, there is no excuse for you
To not go and see your mother.
She doesn't even know you're in india.
And she's even found a lovely girl from jaipur to meet you.
Yeah.
Um, I will call her.
It's just, I've also been so busy with meera's company,
And just tiny little bumps here and there,
Nothing, nothing that...
I think I'm gassy.
You're a strange boy, puru.
You could learn a thing or two from rama.
There is something about him that...
No, he is a great guy. He is amazing.
He's loving, he's loyal, he's caring, he's married to meera.
um...
Listen, you scared me when you jumped out, I've to go and pee.
Hm?
So, should I care what's going on
Between silas averly and your company?
Everything went haywire when I did our presentation.
This is what happens when you google him.
Oh, wow!
He's a serial streaker now?
No. We created these fake sites,
And our app was supposed to delete them.
It was going to be very, very impressive.
Yeah, I know some people that paid a lot of money
To delete stuff about themselves from the internet.
Exactly, and not everyone, especially younger people,
Can afford that and it should be accessible.
Right, well, sounds like your app
Will be important to a lot of people.
Yeah, well, it didn't delete them.
Instead, it published the fake sites.
So, now silas is suing us, and the only way he will settle
Is if we give him the tech.
So, my company is doomed unless we...
Can beef up servers, enhance encryption
And figure out what went wrong with your code.
- Exactly. - Let me see.
We're going on the theory that whoever hacked it
Doesn't want a low-pay app like ours available.
Interesting ui.
We workshopped that ui to death.
Your start button. Shouldn't that say "restart?"
I mean, that's what you're helping people do, right?
Huh. That's actually a good idea.
You got cut from the family business?
That must've been hard.
Are you and your parents not close?
Uh, my dad and I, we were close.
But things got tense over me not marrying,
And then, well, the family business was the last straw.
But you visit them every couple of years, right?
Yeah, mostly to see my mom.
You know, spend a week with her.
- You should see him. - Yeah.
And you should make up with your aunt.
At least, you guys are in the same house together.
What happened with you two, anyway?
Well, good news. Your core code is great.
It's difficult to get around.
But it would take big money
To launch a cyber-attack like that.
What, like how big? Google big?
Could be.
Hello, didi.
Puru, I left my door unlocked last night.
Remember, aunty. Keep it on the dl.
Come on. Suresh kaka is waiting.
Okay, let's go.
Oh, I can't wait to see mumbai. The city of...
I don't know what city of, but I can't wait to see it.
You guys go on ahead, I will catch up.
what is it?
An opportunity.
I used to walk down here with my family all the time.
We used to come during diwali.
Ah, I loved the fireworks.
Hm, who's that guy?
That is "kala goda," meaning black horse.
- "kala goda." - "kala goda."
I think we should take a picture next to "kala goda."
Yeah, sure. I think a couple of pictures there would be great.
- Yeah. - Yeah. Let's go.
Why is he being so weird? I just wanna take a picture.
You did say you don't want a relationship.
Yeah, but I don't want this though.
It's beautiful.
It's just like my mom's.
Oh, she must've had good taste.
Yeah, she did.
I miss her.
meera!
We did a thing in high school.
- Hi. - Hi.
Mee-mee! Kareena and I heard you were back.
- We were at the gymkhanna. - Yeah.
Just thought of checking out the nicest stores across the street.
And you must be the prince charming
That we've heard so much about.
Oh, no, I'm just some guy
That she paid to play her husband.
He's hilarious!
Rama, this is jayanti and karena.
I can't believe you got married after...
Yeah, yeah, yeah, me. That's me, married, of course.
Me with this guy. This hunk of a guy.
- Okay, we need a major catch-up. - Oh, yes, seriously!
you're thinking what I'm thinking?
Yeah! No, no, no. I-I, wait. What?
Karena, catch up. Club euphoria!
They've got the hottest act playing tonight.
- Uh, I know. We've... - We'd love to go.
- Perfect! - Yes.
It'd be just like old times, meera.
I'll text you the deets.
Don't make me come get you.
I know where you live.
And now you too.
- Okay, then. See you! - We'll see you in the evening.
Bye!
- That was fun. - What was that?
I'm trying to forget my past, not relive it.
Oh, I'm sorry. You screamed in unison.
I thought that's what you wanted.
What I want is for everyone to please just stick to the plan
So we can get the inheritance and go back to our lives
In new york.
I asked for a swan.
Why are there ducks in my house? Shoo!
Krishna!
Get rid of those, now!
I like ducks.
What's all this?
- Who are these people? - Party planners. Decorators.
Aunty, we really need to talk about this party.
- I don't wanna... - Oh, that's cancelled.
Oh! Great. Fantastic!
I thought that, after seeing your marriage certificate,
The best thing to do is to cancel your party.
W-w-why? Is there something wrong with the certificate?
Because it's super real. Printed, signed...
T's crossed. I's dotted.
Yeah, witnessed by us. Leslie and I.
Oh, there's nothing wrong with the certificate.
Great, yeah. I mean, why wouldn't it be?
Could I actually get the inheritance then?
- Of course. - Amazing.
- After the wedding. - The what?
Why throw a party when you can throw a wedding?
- Ah! I already had one! - Yes, in the eyes of the court.
But not in the eyes of god.
You know, I was under the illusion the pandit ji
- Actually married you guys. - Oh...
Aunty, um, he just told us about the day.
He-he was busy. He was, uh...
Fishing. He was busy fishing. He's an avid fisher.
Um, it was also an auspicious time to go out fishing.
And what did he say? Mahi mahi shubhmuharthe...
- And just went off fishing. - but we were all there!
Myself, meera, rama, and very unfunny puru.
Be that as it may.
God has decided to tell me that this is our chance to...
How did you say, uh, start again?
- We can't do it. - Oh!
We have to go back. We can't plan a wedding...
What's kavita aunty here for, hm?
I will handle everything. Not to worry.
- Om, we've got to discuss that. - Mm-hmm!
- I have to tell her. - Don't.
Wait, wait, wait!
We're...
We're gonna go out tonight to celebrate.
Mm-hmm.
I-I thought we're gonna need a car,
But we're gonna take a cab!
- The cab! - Yeah, it's the best.
- It's the best option. - Yeah, take a cab, hm.
s-see you!
you, can you please get these ducks
Out of my house?
I need a drink.
- They got nothing on you, babe. - Oh, I don't care.
We're not together. He can have fun tonight!
If I cannot start again,
I'm going to drink the past away.
What about aunty?
Mmm, she can have fun tonight, too, and then, tomorrow,
I will tell her the truth and crush her dreams.
Okay. You are definitely buzzed.
Mmm. Buzz...
That was amazing.
- That was just, wow! - Oh, there are shots.
Meera, why didn't you tell us rama was such a great dancer?
- And so cute! - You okay?
Yeah, perfect. Never better.
I'm surprised you caught this one. She is a runner.
I mean, um, she was quite a wild child back in school.
Yeah, but my baby has tamed the beast, you see.
- Haven't you, baby? - Hey, we all have a past.
You know, as long as you don't let it affect your future,
And that's exactly why meera came up with the best app ever.
Honestly, she's the smartest woman I know.
Aw, that's so sweet!
So, puru...
Remember when you put the moves on me back in school?
I'm all grown, and I'd like to show you
- Some moves of my own. - Oh!
Didn't you get married?
Took a leaf out of your playbook.
No ring on this finger.
I'm trying to convince kareena to do the same,
But she's a romantic, just like rama.
- What? I just love my husband. - That's boring.
Loosen up a little. But things change, you know.
You've grown into such a sexy man.
hey, party people!
The moment you all have been waiting for...
Meera, you're going to love this.
I'm so sorry.
give a loud welcome to our headliner.
Back in his hometown for one night only, dj-x!
It's your boy dj-x in the house!
He used to dj my basement parties.
And now he tours the world. Hot, right?
What's wrong?
meera!
Uh, he's also meera's ex-boyfriend.
She used to be crazy about him.
I thought you said this dj ex was a dork.
Dork no more. Ugh, jayanti.
She's still doing the same stupid shit she did
- When we were teens. - We can split.
No. It is time to dance.
- Is there only one bathroom? - Phew, seriously!
Meera?
Hey, x. What is up?
Well, when jayanti told me
That you were coming for my show,
- I could not believe it. - You were the one djing?
- Yeah. - I barely noticed.
So, uh...
Can we go to some place quiet?
- Meera. - Oh, it's okay.
I'm-I'm not even drunk. Sure. All right, let's go.
- Yeah, let's go. - To the dj.
- Righty. Bye! - Bye!
So, did you like my show?
I don't get dj's.
Like, you're not, like, real musicians.
Lotta like boopity-boop boopity boop-boop-boop.
Push buttons, but whatever.
People people like it or whatever.
I was pretty good at pushing your buttons. Remember, meera?
All I remember is you pushing the angry button
And the sad button.
You bailed on me when they tried to get me married off!
I mean, it's-it's okay. I'm married now.
I got proof!
Proof!
Meera, we were kids, really.
And, babe, trust me.
It took me a long time to realize
That you were the one that got away. Yeah.
Why didn't you come and find me
During your so-called realization?
I'm not, like, waldo. I'm pretty easy to find.
- It's all fake. - What?
- It's all fake anyway. - What, what?
Me, me, me, me, meera.
- If I could just hit start. - Yeah.
- Restart. - Yeah.
- Then start again. - Yeah.
Oh, if I could get that app to work, I swear.
Sure, sure, sure, meera.
Whoa! Wha-what are you doing? Wait up.
Meera, you just said you wanted to restart.
- Not-not on us, stupid! - Come on, meera.
You wanted to...
Meera, are you okay? Hey, look at me.
I can't bre... Peanuts, peanuts!
You're okay.
You okay? Let's go.
Meera! What happened?
Are you okay?
Yeah, you forgot? Peanut allergy.
Oh, no, um. See, I'm so sorry. I didn't even think of that.
Yeah, well, thinking was never one of your strong suits.
This guy give you peanuts or something?
Well, it was an accident, bro.
- Hi, x. - Yeah, I'm rama. Her husband.
Oh, so you are the dude who locked her down.
Congrats, buddy. And I'm so sorry for the peanut lips.
- You kissed her? - Yeah, she's fine.
She's fine? Bro, she could have died!
Where do you get off kissing my wife?
Bro, relax. It is harmless, okay?
And look, she's still breathing.
- Right. Hey! - She's okay.
Hey, bro, relax. It's harmless.
You're still breathing. Idiot!
You just said the same line.
Hey, I'm here.
It's him.
Ugh! Uh-oh, oh!
Wow. That feels like I got all of it out of me.
- Yeah. Because you did. - I'm great.
[indistinct chatter[
Okay, let's get you up here.
Um... My face feels funny.
Okay, that's 'cause that's my face.
You're so right, rama.
It's just so hard doing this by myself.
I get overwhelmed.
People say I'm... A water on duck.
You know, I'm pretty sure people don't say that.
But inside, I...
I-I-I feel like I'm a cocoon before it becomes a duck.
Yeah, th-that's not how the saying goes, but that's okay.
I ran away.
Did you know that?
I left a guy at the altar... And I left my family.
To become a failure.
Hey, you're not a failure, okay?
You're just trying to figure it out like everyone else.
Well, will you just hold me, please, for a second?
I'm not-I'm not gonna throw up on you.
Hmm.
Mmm.
You're gonna make a really great wife...
To a really great husband.
You're just gonna be really great.
Mmm. Yeah, well, that was the plan... Sort of.
Hey, meera, I need to tell you something.
I haven't been completely honest you, I...
I'm not who you think I am. I'm, what's...
Meera?
- That's very good. Excellent! - Shut it off, please!
Meera, that was quite the rest you had.
It's almost noon. Stayed up late?
Oh, god, uh... Yeah, I-I guess...
Yeah, we just sleep really well together.
Honey, can I see you a sec?
- You want to get out of here? - Yes, please.
I just can't take it.
You should just let me tell her the truth.
Yeah, but then your company would be ruined.
I left so that I-I could live my truth.
Why am I having to lie to live it?
I don't know. Maybe we could live it a little longer until...
What? Get married for real?
Why?
I don't know, I think what your company is doing
Is important, you know, we've already come so far.
We can get annulled.
You can tell people that I was too good for you.
They would definitely believe that.
Why are you so nice to me?
Actually, you know, when I first met you,
I thought you were way too into yourself.
- Oh, thank you. - You're welcome.
But then I realized, you're just passionate.
And even though that passion can be infuriating,
It's what makes you who you are.
And if I can be a part of keeping that fire,
Then, that's a win for me.
And if it's any comfort,
It'll still be a sham marriage.
Is that what you want? A sham?
- What is it? - Uh, it's my mom.
Take it.
You shouldn't ignore a call from your mom.
Hey, amma.
How are you? How's dad?
yeah, I'd love to see you. You're gonna cook?
Okay, I love you, then.
Yeah, no, it's good.
So... They're still not back yet?
- No. - Oh.
I think they ran away and eloped.
You know, this whole pretending thing may work for meera,
But... I miss you.
- Kavita aunty will never know. - Are you sure?
'cause I thought you wanted this to be casual.
I did. It was a defense mechanism.
But being out here, you've really grown on me.
Mm.
Um, I'm a grower, they always say.
But... If you want to keep it on the dl, I get it.
Aunty scares me, you know.
And... I've got these old-fashioned parents
And she's got them on speed dial. It's crazy.
Well, you gotta man up.
- Oh, I can man up, baby. - Oh, can you?
- Oh, you want me to? Mm? - Mm-hmm.
Chris?
Hey, guys.
Well, what are you doing here, man?
Grand gesture, bro. I read about it online.
Chicks dig it and I dig meera.
That's love.
Plus, I have not had sex in, like, a week.
That is love for sure. Um, listen...
- She's not here! - Yeah, she's not here.
look, this is ridiculous. This is india.
Come on, bro. Let's go!
Um... She just left for her flight.
You know what, go get to the airport!
- What? - Yeah.
She read the same article as you.
- Grand gestures! - Grand gestures, man!
Go, surprise her mid-flight.
Sing her a song from an adam sandler film!
- Uh, that's solid advice. - Yeah.
But I got a crap voice.
- I could pirouette? - For sure.
Well, I'm sure airlines love it when people, like,
- Jump around on their planes. - Yeah?
- Yeah. Let's go! - Okay.
I'm not running a petting zoo here.
I'm trying to hold a wedding! Yes, thank you!
Aunty, aren't we a pair?
What are you doing here?
I live here.
W-what's going on outside? Someone here?
- All right, brother. - Hey, man.
- See you, man. - See you!
Okay, have a good flight!
Oh, that guy? Your funny story. He's an acrobat.
And I thought he might be nice for the reception.
That's different.
Yeah, he could swing from the arches.
Phew!
Wow! Tourists, huh?
That guy was looking for an ashram.
I said, "dude, does this look like an ashram to you?"
- I sent him right on his way. - I thought he was an acrobat.
An acrobat...
Yeah, an acrobat at the ashram, of course.
Yeah, um...
Anyway, lots to do! Gotta go. See you. Bye!
Om, do you think puru should tell some jokes
At the reception?
No, I don't think...
Oh, I'd pay to see that.
Yeah?
Finally! Where have you guys been?
We have to ask you something.
When's the wedding?
beautiful. Oh, she's got his name in there.
You know, they say that if the color doesn't catch,
- It's a bad omen. - Hmm.
So make sure you don't use your hand until it's dry, okay?
I can't believe you're doing this.
- I mean, I can. It's obvious. - What is?
I've seen the way you look at rama
When you think he can't see you.
Th-that's-that's not what... It's business.
- Is he giving you the business? - Shut up!
Go, go and get me a drink, okay?
How?
Okay.
- Oh, hi, rama! - Ooh, you look nice.
Oh, thank you.
What is this?
This is lemon and sugar.
Keep the mehndi moist, so it catches darker.
The darker it catches, the better your luck.
You know, I actually just heard that.
Mm-hmm.
Although you said it in a more
Glass half-full kind of way.
H-how do you know this?
Ha-ha, well, I have two sisters.
So, they used to practice on me.
Mostly hennaing stupid things on my face.
But trust me, this is the secret
To my clear complexion,
- Lemon and sugar. - Ooh.
Your parents coming to the wedding?
Uh, I just said that out loud. Wedding.
Uh, no, I don't, I don't think so.
I think it's my dad's, well...
Yeah.
You should go see them.
I made a lot of bad choices 'cause I didn't have them around
To guide me.
Well, you have your aunt and uncle.
Kind of.
My aunt got thrust from this friend role to this parent role.
And I didn't really want a new mom.
They tried their best, but I guess
We just never really got through it.
Can't change the past.
Hey, it's okay.
We're figuring it out now.
Thanks to you, honestly.
You kind of like me, don't you?
Shut up.
Hey, there's something I've been wanting to tell you.
Wait.
Change, in the past. I'm so stupid. That's it!
I-I don't have time... Work.
Sorry about that. What are you doing? Need help?
I'm just checking all code merges from the days
Before the presentation.
It's gonna take a while, but should be able to connect
The timestamps from the server computers to the user profile
That made all the changes.
Okay.
There, look at that.
The mehndi took. I guess I'm not doomed after all.
- Hi! - Hello, aunty.
- How are you, aunty? - How are you?
You look fabulous. Enjoy yourselves.
Wait a second. I'll be back.
You would not believe where I've been, bro.
I love india.
Yeah, man.
The rickshaw driver and I stopped for paan
And that's when things got crazy.
I guess it was laced with some psychedelics.
We had this great chat, pure mental communication
Through our third eyes and then
We ended up at this local ashram, right?
They bring out a tiger and they want me to fight the tiger.
And I was scared, but I looked at the tiger's eyes
And he was scared too.
And that's when I knew we were one.
So I went over to him and I said, "meow!"
And impressed all the locals and they said,
"you are our new monk."
Took me a couple hours, but I achieved enlightenment
Which isn't as much as everyone makes it out to be.
Don't worry about it, if you never get there.
And then, when I came back to the city,
I met this beautiful woman. Uh, there she is.
She brought me here, to meera's wedding. Do you see?
So now when they ask if anyone objects,
I'm gonna jump up and make my move.
Yeah, I don't think that happens in indian weddings, man.
Okay, bro. I think she's moved on.
And... You should go back home.
He's my plus one, puru.
Yeah.
It's sad, you know. He could use some more "oms."
Definitely.
You can't run away this time.
I've bolted all the windows.
Oh, let her be. Meera, we are here for you.
She's just happy that I'm finally having
An indian wedding.
Tell her.
Just tell me.
Meera... You know, when you came to us,
You were already so independent, smart.
Free-spirited.
I didn't know how to be a good mother to you.
But that's all I've really wanted to be.
So I did the next best thing.
To honor my sister's final wishes
That when you got married, you would get your inheritance
And you could go away to live a new life with a new family.
The best thing I could do to support you...
Was to let you go, meera.
Though all I really wanted was for you to stay.
But you know, I'm so proud of you for finding somebody
To love all on your own.
We're so glad you're finally home
And letting us do this for you.
I know that back then I was difficult.
I guess I was blinded in my own grief,
But I... I kinda appreciate the kinds of sacrifices
You both made to just try to keep me happy...
And how hard it must've been for you.
- I'm sorry. - No!
I really, I really am.
Oh, you got no idea what I just saw.
There he is, our lovely puru.
You know if you and leslie want to live in sin
Out of wedlock, we're okay with that.
- Mm, what-what do you mean? - It's so obvious.
You're very funny, but you're a terrible liar.
Hmm.
I'm game if you are.
- Not here! - Oh, sorry!
I think we should give meera a minute.
- You too. - Let's go.
You gave me some good advice before.
I do not know if it was all that good.
It brought me to this moment.
Well, something is missing from this moment.
- My mother's necklace. - Put it on.
You know, I also lost my parents when I was very young
Like you did.
And that is why I think we got along so well together.
Your aunt has always loved you unconditionally.
And tonight, she was being honest.
That took a lot from her. Isn't it time you do the same?
Is it me or does it seem like
They're actually into each other?
Don't worry, I've got a feeling it's gonna end
Just the way it did a decade ago.
Aunty... Uncle.
I can't do this. I can't deceive you.
This is a sham. We're not married.
rama was just doing me a favor
So I could get my inheritance.
My company was in trouble and-and I just blurted out
What I thought you wanted to hear.
But what's the point in success if I can't share it
With my family?
Rama helped me realize that what was missing
From-from everything I achieved was you two.
Three.
I'm so sorry.
I've put you through way more than I asked for.
But, you know... I've had the greatest time with you
These last few days.
I hope someday you can forgive me.
"dear, groom, I know that I picked the worst time,
But it'd be unfair to you and myself
If I let us go through with this."
How... Do you know that letter?
You know, I've read it so many times
It's just burnt on my mind.
You were that groom?
But his name was agastya.
Americans can't pronounce agastya,
So I went with my middle name.
Rama.
Yeah.
You did all of this... Just to get back at me?
What? No!
Damn!
meera, wait...
I'm so sorry.
I can't imagine what I put you and uncle through.
No, not as much as that boy, meera.
You know, I can't believe I didn't recognize him.
I can.
And considering how many boys we looked at,
- I may be face blind now. - Yeah, chi!
- She's better off rid of him. - I feel bad for him though.
- Poor boy. - What? He lied to her, om.
You know, I agree with uncle.
I mean, come on. The dude likes you.
He-he probably loves you.
He's been pining away so long.
Yeah, he's not doing this for money. He only wants you.
Even the parts about you that suck.
You owe him a conversation.
This is terrible advice you both are giving her.
I won't let you influence her like this.
Wait a minute, aren't you the one who said that
He was a good boy? And then when you met him... Again?
Yes, but that was before I knew him, no?
Ah!
You know, I'm sure he wants to go viral
With some revenge trick against the girl who left him
Stranded at the altar or something like that.
It's like that show that puru keeps watching.
He wasn't doing a punk'd, aunty.
Ah! That, "punk'd."
Did your aunty ever tell you about our introduction?
- No. - No.
She wouldn't meet with me either.
- What? - yeah.
Your grandparents had to drag her,
Kicking and screaming to our house.
That sound familiar, sweetheart?
Is that true?
Oh, my memory's foggy.
And even after she came, she refused to wear any makeup
Or get dressed up.
She came with a t-shirt, jeans,
And a whole lot of attitude.
She insisted she would be wearing plain clothes
Most of our lives so why present herself as anyone else?
Wait. So what made you say yes to her?
She was different, and although I knew
I would have to put up with a lot of,
What is it you kids call it nowadays?
- Extra. - Yeah, extra.
I also knew whatever that extra was,
I would never be bored.
Also her ass looked amazing in those jeans.
Om!
Amma!
Amma.
Suresh, count the number of pieces, yeah?
- Ah, yeah. - Okay.
I'm gonna miss you guys so much.
- Oh, leslie. - Yeah.
But thanks for calling mom and dad.
You better go and see them next time.
Ah! I will.
Okay.
I'll see you sooner rather than later this time.
Perhaps sooner if my company tanks.
We're family. We'll cover you as much as we can.
Until you finally, eventually get married.
Till then, your inheritance is gaining interest.
Mmm.
Oh, who's that?
Uh, excuse me a minute.
Hi, chris.
I-I-I'm glad you're here.
- Look, this thing between... - Shh.
I don't want you to embarrass yourself with a big speech
In front of your family, but our journey has come to an end.
They've asked me to play the villain in a bollywood movie.
He's a british general who joins the circus.
Anyway, I just wanted to tell you in person.
And give you a chance to say goodbye.
This is a lot to take in.
But, um...
I'm proud of you.
Bye, chris.
Your favorite.
Prodigal son returns. Still single though, I hear.
- Oh, mom told you? - Didn't have to.
I could smell it on you.
arey, idiot. Gossip travels.
I knew before you got into your car.
I still can't believe she made a fool out of you again.
She didn't make a fool of me the first time, dad.
She actually showed me what I was supposed to be.
- What? A cook? - A little more than a cook now.
So where is your restaurant in america?
Sold it. Built a successful app.
You never gave up on your dream.
So why are you giving up on love?
Uh...
I-I tricked her, dad.
And love is just a trick of the heart, isn't it?
Who cares what jadoo or kis led to pyar,
But if she feels it, too, you owe it to yourself to try.
Uh, she's-she's pretty mad.
If you love her, the best you could do
Is ask for her forgiveness.
Eat!
Holy crap! I knew it.
What?
Did a certain groom you keep leaving
At the altar just text you?
I just got back the results
From the analysis I sent in on the code
And we were definitely hacked.
I knew it.
And it originated from averley servers.
Holy crap! Silas is trying to steal our code!
That's crazy! Call the fcc or the fbi or whoever handles this!
- Yeah. - I have enough proof.
We can fix this and we'll definately not be settling
The lawsuit by giving him our tech!
Do you want me to lose him?
- Grand gestures, man. - Meera.
The guy is chasing you out on a motorcycle
After you dumped him twice.
I think you should hear what he has to say.
- I don't care. - yes, you do.
You may never see him again. Stop the car!
Listen... We like you.
But we love her. Understood?
Got it.
Can we talk?
Look, meera, do you know what I saw on that day
We were supposed to meet for the first time?
I watched you fight to forge your own path on my driveway.
- Sorry about the potted plant. - We replaced it.
Look, after you left, I was pushed even harder to marry.
And then I heard that you went to america all by yourself.
Like, you had the courage to fight for what you wanted.
How-how could I not do the same? You inspired me.
Oh.
And when I saw you at that party,
I recognized you instantly.
And I wanted to say thank you for what you did.
So why didn't you, instead of lying
About literally everything?
I intended to, and then, I remembered that you were
So opposed to the mere idea of me
That you ran ten thousand miles away.
Then I went and I talked to you, and you were amazing.
You were funny, sweet,
Totally frantic and obsessed with your job.
And then, when leslie pitched in the idea, well,
I thought maybe this was my chance to show you
Who I really am.
Stupid charm offensive.
You might think that I never thought about what I did to you.
But, of course, I did. I was young and stupid.
Sometimes I even regretted it.
We would have hated each other.
Who says we don't now?
If I never left...
I would have never found my own way.
But if you hadn't come into my life...
I would have never found my way back.
So where does that leave us now?
I think...
I think if you're still willing,
Three attempts later...
Maybe we can hit restart?
Restart, huh? That's pretty catchy.
It'd be good on a button somewhere.
You had one good idea.
Don't let it go to your head.